VooDoo

random thoughts from people "our age"

2009-08-21T21:28:26Z

A friend shared this and it was too damn funny not to share some more.

Random thoughts from people our age...

-I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f*** was going on when I first saw it.

-I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

-How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.

- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

- Was learning cursive really necessary?

- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

- Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

- My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

-What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

-Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

- I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

- Bad decisions make good stories

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

- Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Dammit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

-It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I’d bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

-It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

--------------

Hopefully some of those made you laugh or chuckle.

Peace,

VooDoo

synchronicity / the note I needed today

2009-03-25T18:12:37Z

Daily OM: A Great Teacher
Living Like Water

The journey of water as it flows upon the earth can be a mirror of our own paths through life. Water begins its residence on earth as it falls from the sky or melts from ice and streams down a mountain into a tributary or stream. In the same way, we come into the world and begin our lives on earth. Like a river that flows within the confines of its banks, we are born with certain defining characteristics that govern our identity. We are born in a specific time and place, within a specific family, and with certain gifts and challenges. Within these parameters, we move through life, encountering many twists, turns, and obstacles along the way just as a river flows.

Water is a great teacher that shows us how to move through the world with grace, ease, determination, and humility. When a river breaks at a waterfall, it gains energy and moves on, as we encounter our own waterfalls, we may fall hard but we always keep moving on. Water can inspire us to not become rigid with fear or cling to what’s familiar. Water is brave and does not waste time clinging to its past, but flows onward without looking back. At the same time, when there is a hole to be filled, water does not run away from it in fear of the dark; instead, water humbly and bravely fills the empty space. In the same way, we can face the dark moments of our life rather than run away from them.

Eventually, a river will empty into the sea. Water does not hold back from joining with a larger body, nor does it fear a loss of identity or control. It gracefully and humbly tumbles into the vastness by contributing its energy and merging without resistance. Each time we move beyond our individual egos to become part of something bigger, we can try our best to follow the lead of the river.

one of those moments:

2009-03-22T19:56:16Z

leaving Capitol Hill yesterday morning, there was fog over the city center:

Enviro volunteering Saturday!

2009-02-24T18:46:32Z

I'm gonna be out getting dirty and being useful Saturday.
The event is open for anyone, fyi.
:-)

Volunteer Event: Llandover Woods
Date & Time:
Saturday, February 28, 2009
10:00 am - 2:00 pm

Event Description
Join EarthCorps, the Green Seattle Partnership, and the Friends of Llandover Woods for the day and volunteer to create healthy forests! Llandover Woods is an urban haven located right along the Seattle-Shoreline border. Following its 1/2 mile trail, you can see huge Douglas fir, giant Big Leaf Maple and forget that the noise of the city is right around the corner!

Help us keep this urban haven safe! Work to remove invasive plant species and create areas to plant native plants. Let's work together to make Llandover Woods a healthy forest!

website:
http://www.earthcorps.org/volunteer.php?dateId=567

<3 VooDoo

love and greeks

2009-01-15T19:29:46Z

In case there was a doubt: Fox sucks!

2008-12-30T22:08:20Z

Watchmen fan invites Fox to eat several dicks
(and explains legal controversy in terms of bacon)

http://www.cracked.com/blog/fox-can-eat-several-dicks/

grrrrr about greedy people who suck
(and then want to mess with Watchmen)

--VooDoo

I PASSED!

2008-12-17T21:56:06Z

I went in and updated my contact info and had them send the results to a different email address.

I PASSED THE FE!
I'M NOW OFFICIALLY CERTIFIED AS AN EIT (engineer in training)!

*ecstatic happy dance*

defintely celebrating this weekend - Merc on Saturday!!!

many thanks to everyone who encouraged me, listened to me stress and vent and thought good things, prayed or crossed their fingers for me.

*joy*

--VooDoo

Holiday Eating Tips

2008-12-15T22:01:12Z

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they’re serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. Quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it’s rare. In fact, its even rarer than single-malt scotch, because you can’t find it at any other time of year. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in ever sip? Its not as if you’re going to turn into an “eggnog-aholic” or something. It’s a treat so enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two for me. Its later than you think.

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That’s the whole point of gravy. Gravy doesn’t stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it overflowing with gravy. Repeat.

4. As for the mashed potatoes, always ask if they are made with skim milk or whole milk. If skim milk, just pass. Honestly, why bother? Its like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do NOT have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people’s food for free. And lots of it.

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year’s. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you’ll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10 pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, (like frosted cookies the in the shape and size of Santa) position yourself next to them and don’t budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They’re like a great pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you’ll never see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don’t like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get more than one dessert?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Leave. NOW. Granted it’s loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all costs. I mean, have some standards. There is a working theory that there are, in fact, only 9 fruitcakes in the world, and that those 9 are simply circulated from family to family. If they won’t eat it, you sure as hell shouldn’t.

10. If you don’t feel horrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you obviously haven’t been paying attention. You should need to let out your pants at least an inch by the time you attempt to leave, or you just haven’t been eating enough. You can ignore this rule if you were smart and wore stretchy pants to the party in the first place.

<3 VooDoo

skyjanus @ 2008-12-13T23:07:00

2008-12-14T07:07:52Z

quote...

2008-12-01T16:24:30Z

"If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside."

Victory!

2008-11-28T22:31:10Z

50,414 words

Not what I would call a great ending, and I'm trying not to think about the plot holes that a semi-truck could be driven through...
the point is:

I WIN!

<3 VooDoo

LMAO!

2008-11-27T03:16:30Z

be proud of me?!

2008-11-26T04:30:14Z

I finally opened (and emptied) the last two boxes that moved in with me!
:-D

There are still odds and ends to find places for, and I totally need more shelves, but it's good to know where the clothes are that I've been missing for months!
:-)

Also, if anyone wants/needs a TV (20" old school, cable ready, with remote) or a microwave (with rotating glass dish), let me know.
Both work great -
They made the move with me and are great at taking up space, but are serving no real purpose for me.

<3 VooDoo

hee hee hee

2008-11-25T18:35:33Z

typing...

2008-11-24T01:33:47Z

hibernating & overachieving
:-P

rotting my brain, avoiding real work...

just one of those weekends (through no fault of my own, in some cases)

--VooDoo

skyjanus @ 2008-11-22T21:10:00

2008-11-23T05:11:37Z

lame people suck.

enough said.

working on the novel - just crossed 40k

--VooDoo

thanksgiving fun!`

2008-11-21T06:51:09Z

so, my peeps in MI are hitting up the BEST IRISH PUB the country the night after Thanksgiving.
no flights are available for less than $500 (I seriously looked into flying back just to go)

Anyone want to rock a pub out here so we can drink with them in spirit?????!!!

<3 VooDoo

P.S. there are requirements - must have live Irish music!!!

Writer's Block: Under the Tree

2008-11-21T02:36:13Z

What gifts, big or small, are you hoping to find under the tree this year?

NaNo update

2008-11-20T05:30:08Z

Random plot devices that I have managed to incorporate so far, supplied by the WRIMO "bingo" card that one of the Everett ML's was nice enough to make:

-A flash in the pan
-All snowflakes are identical
-A sudden downpour of shoes
-Movie Narrator: "In a world where..."
-Talking Turtles
-A gaggle of reporters
-15 minutes of fame
-Unwanted embryos
-Lost ballots
-Maniacal monologue
-Small rodents panic
-The executive branch
-An unnoticed introvert
-"It's pronounced kee-sh"
-"Never forget the tacos!!!"
-A town is destroyed
-Pioneers
-Potatoes
-Nonviolent restraint

Also, by request, I immortalized Claire (red-haired legal student) in the novel. She was actually in the same sentence as the missing ballots and the gaggle of reporters.
;-)
And I got Lydia's cat, Chloe, in there too, kind of.

<3 VooDoo

New Springsteen album- January 27!

2008-11-17T21:14:04Z

Bruce Springsteen's new album "Working on a Dream" has been set for a January 27 release on Columbia Records. "Working on a Dream" was recorded with the E Street Band and features twelve new Springsteen compositions plus two bonus tracks. It is the fourth collaboration between Springsteen and Brendan O'Brien, who produced and mixed the album.

"Working on a Dream" Song Titles:

1.
Outlaw Pete
2.
My Lucky Day
3.
Working on a Dream
4.
Queen of the Supermarket
5.
What Love Can Do
6.
This Life
7.
Good Eye
8.
Tomorrow Never Knows
9.
Life Itself
10.
Kingdom of Days
11.
Surprise, Surprise
12.
The Last Carnival

Bonus tracks:
The Wrestler
A Night with the Jersey Devil

Bruce Springsteen said, "Towards the end of recording 'Magic,' excited by the return to pop production sounds, I continued writing. When my friend producer Brendan O'Brien heard the new songs, he said, 'Let's keep going.' Over the course of the next year, that's just what we did, recording with the E Street Band during the breaks on last year's tour. I hope 'Working on a Dream' has caught the energy of the band fresh off the road from some of the most exciting shows we've ever done. All the songs were written quickly, we usually used one of our first few takes, and we all had a blast making this one from beginning to end.
"

"Working on a Dream" is Bruce Springsteen's twenty-fourth album and was recorded and mixed at Southern Tracks in Atlanta, GA with additional recording in New York City, Los Angeles, and New Jersey

NaNo pep talk!

2008-11-17T04:23:48Z

Dear NaNoWriMo Participant,

In the last two weeks, we've traversed dark caverns, swung through treacherous ravines, and felt the cool breezes of hope blowing across our tired, keyboard-indented brows. And now we've arrived at Week Three. The beginning of the end. The moment when our struggle tips towards victory.
There are four things to keep in mind about Week Three:

1) Word-count-wise, the 20,000s are where the dread beasties of Week Two will make their final lunge for your kneecaps. Kick them off, and use all of your sprinting skills and word-count-bolstering tricks you've learned in the last two weeks to get to 30K. If you need to have your characters sing "American Pie" in its entirety or recite some of their favorite passages from telephone books, so be it. Also, if you are writing alone, stop that. Affiliate with your local NaNoWriMo region through your My NaNoWriMo page, and then start going to write-ins. If you don't have a local NaNoWriMo group, sign in and join a Word War or three on the forums.

2) At 25K, we party. Yes, 25K falls squarely in the middle of the arid 20,000s, where vultures pick clean the bones of dawdling novelists. It may seem like a bad choice for a party location, but when you hit the halfway point of NaNoWriMo, celebration is a must. Our tech team of Russ and Sam had been working night and day on modifying your author profile to release a shower of confetti, doves, and 10,000-Euro notes when you cross the magic midway. Their work was almost completed when they were called away to fix a graph-line on someone's word-count widget.

We'll get the money and doves in place for next year. In the meantime, we'll just put together our own celebrations. Think about taking yourself and your favorite cheerleader out for dinner. Splurge on a babysitter and spend a Saturday getting a massage, or buy yourself that gadget you've always wanted (and yes, cars count as gadgets). You've outwritten most of your fellow participants and you're still going strong. Raise a glass to yourself at 25K, hero. You deserve it.

3) Know the end is near. If you are falling behind, and are thinking you might bow out and work on your novel when you're less busy, think again. You still have plenty of time to do this. With 115,000 people tackling the same crazy challenge at the exact same time, we've temporarily bent the laws of motivational physics. There's a special noveling window open now that will makes passage through your story easier now than it will be at any other time of year. Sadly, the window closes on December 1. If you're absolutely, positively sure you can't make it to 50K, reset your goal to 25K, and write towards it with everything you've got. Your adventure is not over. Your story awaits.

For those of you who are on track with your word counts, Week Three is when you should start thinking about how you're going to get a complete arc written in November. If the end of your book still feels light years away, think about abbreviating scenes, omitting chapters, and jumping ahead to the middle-end and end-end of your story. It's much, much easier to go back in December and flesh out the connecting bits you skipped than it is to write an entire ending.

4) Short-term goals make all of this goal-reaching and arc-building less daunting. In the last email we went after 15K by Monday the 10th. This time, let's do 30K by the time we go to bed on Wednesday the 19th. At that point, we'll be out of the beastie-filled 20s, and into a great new place. It's called the homestretch, and I think you're going to love it.

You can do it, writer!

Chris
NaNoWriMo

Political Statement

2008-11-07T18:13:46Z

I don't care who you voted for -

http://www.zefrank.com/from52to48withlove/index.html

skyjanus @ 2008-10-31T13:14:00

2008-10-31T20:15:50Z

Danielle Corsetto, the author of my FAVORITE web comic Girls With Slingshots is going to be @ Emerald City Comicon in April.

*squee*
*excitement*

In case you haven't taken my advice yet, check it out:

http://www.daniellecorsetto.com/gws.html

Katt is my hero!

2008-10-31T14:52:57Z

She had a bull whip that I could borrow, so I'm dressed up as Indiana Jones for work today.
:-D
(really, you can fake the clothes, but you HAVE to have the hat & the whip).
I know I'm a little crazy, but it makes me happy.

I'm going out (somewhere downtown most likely) tonight as Super Girl.

Katt has decided to attempt writing a novel with me in the month of November, so somewhere shortly after midnight, we'll start typing madly.
:-D

I multi-tasked and carved my pumpkin lsat night while taking care of a conference call (which was productive)!
It looks really cool - I carved a spider web into it.
:-)
Pics are up on Facebook and MySpace.
It's just not Halloween if I don't get to carve a pumpkin.

That's it for now, but I might bust out with more random updates later.

Peace.

--VooDoo

Halloween Emergency!

2008-10-31T02:35:25Z

Does anyone have a whip I can borrow TONIGHT?

I had a mental flash for a totally appropriate work costume: Indiana Jones!
I can make it work, but I don't own a whip.

Let me know if anyone has one I can run over and borrow!